Tuesday, November 27, 2007

sittin' round waitin for an airplane


so the trip has started to my zex sea in aceetobee, not in the aegean circle...so how can i go to an airport without thinking about the seinfeld airport bit- my 3 bags packed to the gills with mostly camping stuff and then some clothes. i approach the ticket counter and i get a look as if i had lobsters coming from my ears. i get the "all this is for you?" from the over worked under paid ticket counter attendant. i am flying the airline formally known as domination aka delta- thanks to leo mullen and a chapter 11 they are now crawling back to the top slowly but not surly. as going through the crackpot security in savannah they looked @ my bag like it was from tralfamadore- stuffed like a turkey with electronics and whatever else i could cram in there. i got the triple take on the id- thinking i was a good ole southern terrorist from south carolina- i as i await to be pulled for the full cavity search, i somehow breeze through the security without a hitch. no beeps for me. i walk down the seemingly boundless terminal, the golfcart with no one on it, passes me, empty and i was offered no assistance in my trek- i take a seat and i zone out from the 3 hours sleep i had the previous night- in my mind i was envisaging what was going to happen on the trip- being alone for a few weeks, me in a ford focus, and how i forgot my beard trimmer. will i go wook? naaaaaaa- the time has finally come for me to go to the land many call the most beautiful place on earth- i will determine that myself. the goldcart passes me 3-4 more times, again still empty each time- as she makes the hairpin turn she races down the terminal like dale earnhardt in daytona. they make the 1st boarding call and people arise in a frenzy to be the 1st one on. i wait till the last minute- as i board the airplane as i miss the sounds of enya- circa late 90's delta boarding music- to hear a cry of a baby and rednecks plotting their big kill in kansas. i have the entire row to myself and for a tall guy this is good- yet i see an exceptionally finer choice 2 rows ahead- i am eying it up like it was arleen out my window- the poor man's 1st class- that's right- the emergency exit row- i may not be served sundays with super models but i can cross my legs and stretch out- as long as i am not next to the galley or the bathroom, then i am fine- nothing like the smell of a nice fresh pumped lav to get the day going. there is approximately 10 minutes till departure and i await to see if anyone comes on. i make the dash to the row ahead and hope for the best- there are a few stragglers that send butterflies in my stomach, am i in their seat? will i have to give up the lap of luxury and return to my 31 inches of legroom? as the last body files into the plane i look around @ all the suckers with far less leg room and count my blessings. the last person to enter the plane makes a turn to the right and looks @ me(part of the hunting group)- so i thought- he gets confused and heads to 1st class- he then pokes back through the curtain to wave to his friends and gives them a big "fuck you" smile and goes about his way. why do they have the curtsain anyway? what is beyond that thing? is there really a need? on final approach into atlanta i open my window to the sunrise- i yank out my camera and i break all the FAA rules of flight and i take a few pics- what is the worst that will happen? the the navigation go down and they can't find the airport? they may actually have to take the plane off autopilot and fly it? we land with a very hard thump on the right wheel then the left- they give full flaps and reverse thrust and i say to myself "shitty landing, must have been the first officer" i grab my stuff and try to beat the rush to get off only to be headed off my the parental units of the ear- piercing, crying baby from earlier. as i await to deplane, again, no music. i find myself in the "e" terminal in atlanta, e for international- i arrive and the local brothern are opening the kiosks, stores and other places of business. do they know what things cost on the outside? i grab a muffin, latte and a bottle of water for $10.30 and i find my way to my gate. i sit here with newlyweds, an emo artist that i really want to see what she is laying down on that sketch book- the unpleasant sound of the trashcan compacting every 5 minutes or so interrupts the bass dropped bombs of the biscuits as i bob my head. they launch into morph düsseldorf as i await my wind @ 10 to fly

4 comments:

tatum said...

"dropped bombs of the biscuits"

Kelly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Thinktree Design Studio said...

Hey, it's kelly....I wish I could go too.

Scott said...

sounds like your having fun!